Bitter With Baggage

T and I found the best book ever one day on the clearance table at Urban Outfitters: Bitter With Baggage Seeks Same: The life and times of some chickens, by Sloane Tanen. The book includes photographs of a series of dioramas with little puffball chickens participating in events/encounters of everyday life.



Apparently, the lovely and talented Ms. Tanen was commissioned by the city of NY, or the MTA, or some friggin' organization to create dioramas of chickens doing NY things. They're in the subways. They're brilliant. She gives me reason to believe in the future of art. She gives me reason to hope.

I heart tennis

I love tennis. I always have. But, you know what makes loving tennis a lot easier lately? The plethora of really good, really hot players.

Case in point: Marat Safin



Holy shit, this boy has really come into his own. I had a dream last night, after watching the Safin/Federer match, that I ran into Marat in a tennis equipment store and he was helping me pick out a racket and then helped me with my backhand. I woke up loving him even more.

I Will Value You, Will You Value Me

Apparently my blog has value.

SpongeBob and Patrick, sitting in a tree . . .

. . . F-U-C-K-I-N-G

I have discovered definitive proof that Focus on Family's claim that SpongeBob is gay and carrying on an illicit relationship with his "best friend" Patrick is absolutely TRUE!



It is quite clear what is going on in the picture. Come to think of it, I've always been suspicious of SB's admiration for Squidward (voiced by the aptly-named Roger Bumpass). Seems SB's not merely gay, but potentially promiscuous as well

The thing is, they look really happy. If only they understood the unearthly torture that awaits them in hell.

I coulda been a model

I coulda, shoulda been a model.

It's really fun to google yourself. Here's me as a toddler model. A todel, if you will.



I spent the day bargain bunting with KA. I bought socks. She did better.

Top NYC experiences of the day:

1. I saw a man sneeze at MOMA and heard fluid hit the floor. Literally: splat.

2. Dapper elderly man at the MOMA gift shop reading a book entitled, "XXX: 30 Porn Star Portraits."

Astoria Guy

I put "Astoria, NY" into google and searched images. This is one of the first ones that came up.

Henceforth, I would like you to think of this guy whenever you think of me in Astoria.

Gettin' Around

I more than made up for my lack of motivation yesterday.

KrisAnne was in town and we were all over the city. I was away from my apartment, mostly on my feet, from 11:00 am to 10:00 pm and I am pooped.

I found the cutest ever pointy pink flats at Filene's Basement for $9. That made my day.

KrisAnne introduced me to the Strand bookstore, where I picked up Paul Krugman's new book, The Great Unraveling, which I am very excited to delve into. He's my favorite economist ever.

I was going to post pictures today, as text-only posts can get pretty boring, but my picture upload site is down for maintenance. Alas, y'all will have to wait to see the glory that is my pointy pink flats.

As much as I would love to post something witty and entertaining, I am too exhausted to string together thoughts, much less type them coherently into my computer. Today I am boring. I'll try harder tomorrow.

Sex and the City

I thought I was going out tonight and I did not, but I watched Sex and the City and they went out, so that's almost the same, right?

Today, day four of project NYC, I did nothing. I think I crashed. And I had my period. And it was cold outside. I needed to rest and so I did. Is that so lame?

There's this hot metal pole in my bathroom and I burned my arm on it. I was literally burned by my apartment. I have pictures, but unfortunately they are being held prisoner by my camera until I find that stupid cable.

My friend KrisAnne is in town for an opera audition. We're going to Daffy's Bargain Clothes for Millionaires tomorrow. I have no idea what it is, but I'm sure it's fabulous if KrisAnne's involved.

I have nothing. I did nothing.

NYC Baby

This is day three of my new life as a New Yorker. I'm still experiencing a little insomnia, so was up at 5:15 am. I putzed around all morning, then went to open a checking account at my new bank, Chase. I selected Chase b/c it's the first bank I encounter when exiting the train. It was close between Chase and Citibank, but I think I still owe Citibank from my credit-induced stupor college days, so I didn't want to alert them to my whereabouts.

Equipped with 8 new checks and a brand new Chase banking card, I hit Manhattan to shop for a mattress pad. With my trusty Not For Tourists book at my side, I quickly found Bed, Bath and Beyond and treated myself to the bottom of the line, $19.99 polyester-fill queen-size mattress pad. I was tempted by the $24.99 waterproof option, but I think I can control myself.

I'm happy to report the my maiden solo voyage into Manhattan was successful in that I got what I went for, I did not end up in Brooklyn or the Bronx, I did not freeze to death or get hit by a taxi, and I made absolutely no kind of fool of myself (that I know of). It was a good day.

I would love to post pictures of my fabulous adventures, but I stupidly packed up the USB cable that connects my camera to my computer and it's currently in my storage locker back in St. Paul. If anyone has an extra win/mac USB cable for an Olympus D-540 send it my way.